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How To Turn Your Shame Into Peace

Danny Peavey
Danny Peavey
3 min read
How To Turn Your Shame Into Peace
  1. Say goodbye to the "Savior of the World" mentality. The world is too big and too complicated for you to fix it all. There's only one Savior of the World, and even He hung only out with 12 people. The best thing we can do is go more in-depth with fewer people, which allows us to pursue intimacy and vulnerability in a more fulfilling way. It also allows our brains to focus on and fix more problems. Why do we get in these "Savior of The World" mentalities? I think it's two-fold: the inherent pressure to know it all and the desire to living a meaningful life. Both nobles intents, but the execution can't be sweeping generalizations or striving. And if you are in an existential crisis, then I would argue you are actually experiencing a deficiency of grace.
  2. Reject the desire to know it all. There's an undercurrent of shame in today's world that says, "if you are uneducated about any subject, then you are 'asleep,' 'ignorant,' or 'canceled.' Our brains can't handle all this data input, and if the Internet died today, you would only know what's "going on" in your local town. Here's the reality: the more you know, the less you know.
  3. Stop feeling guilty for resting. God rested when he created the world, and Jesus slept when people were dying all around him. Still not convinced? Your body forces you to rests for 1/3 of the day naturally.
  4. Stop feeling guilty for having money or talent. God created an economy in Genesis and put Adam in an economy to work it. Economies naturally yield fruit. Also, the parable of the ten talents in the Bible is not only about investing - it's a parable about multiplying the skills + money you have, which I would argue is a key to self-actualization and a meaningful life. Oh, and, the one dude in the parable who didn't multiply his money + talent had it taken from him and given it to the wealthiest person who knew how to multiply it. (Jesus would totally get canceled on Twitter nowadays). Stop making money such a big deal and see it as a tool to multiply the gifts inside of you and serve people who encounter you. Meeting needs is an intimate way to love people, and businesses are structured to do that very thing, so if you work for or run a business, you are performing a holy act—every day.
  5. Stop feeling guilty for not helping everyone. Jesus didn't heal everyone. That may feel mean to us, and I agree. It feels unfathomable to me. Why didn't He heal everyone? I don't know. Maybe it was His way of demonstrating to us that we can't. Perhaps it was His way of doing what His Father showed Him. Maybe it was his focus for his life's grand finale, which required saying no to the 1v1 moments. Either way, you can't help everyone because if you did, you would have nothing left. Why do we struggle with this? I think it's the refusal to accept grace. Without grace, we must pay back and exert ourselves down to the bone to prove why God is who He says He is. Accept grace. Now.
  6. Wave goodbye to shame. Song of Solomon is about a woman (represents you and me) who sees her imperfections, self-hatred, shame, faults, depression, anxiety, plus more. The man (who represents God) simply tells her who she is and compliments her the entire book. He doesn't punish, rebuke, or chastise. He accepts, pursues, and loves. Say goodbye to your shame and replace it with the reality of how He sees you: as lovely, faults and all.
  7. Stop thinking systems can save us all. I'm a six on the Enneagram, which means I love safety/security, which means I love systems. We can work on systems and should - administrative gifts are scriptural and needed. But systems won't save us because once you create/fix the new system, there will be a new problem to fix, which will require a new system. In the same way, the New Testament revealed sin/death; systems show the need for new systems. But even those will fail.

And lastly:

Become self-aware and cultivate the very presence and person of Jesus at this very moment.

Why?

  • He is the Savior of the world.
  • He knows it all (look up the word logos)
  • His grace is sufficient
  • He rested so you can too
  • Jesus discovered His talents and multiplied them so you can too
  • Jesus made money so you can too
  • He structured time in an interesting way: all you have is the present moment (the past is gone and the future isn't here)
  • Yielding, listening, and doing what your Father says in each moment is a faster path to a meaningful life than knowledge
  • He told you you aren't worthless (Song of Solomon)
  • He's the prince of peace and lives inside of you so you can experience peace

What about you? How do you turn these small moments of persecution into significant moments of peace?

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Danny Peavey

I'm Danny. I like to write and create every single day.